Not having energy to do the most basic daily things while having the drive of this day and age to have some sort of intellectual satisfaction I struggle daily. Over the years I’ve found an approach that kind of works.
It seems Scot Adams, from Dilbert comics, has written it all down in a book.
How handy.
Here’s the checklist I made up. On it all the things I need to do and not forget. I structured it around the resting moments. I can’t believe it took me all day to make this… I’m so fogged!
I want to use this so I don’t have to remember everything. Green is a good colour for it.
On a day that I have no plans this is what I’d do:
About the resting:
About the cortisol:
planning things in advance is crucial:
doing things in steps is better albeit a bit messy:
FOOD for the next weeks:
on Monday the 16th I’ll prepare a fatty steak (riblap). This will hopefully feed me until Friday.
There are two or three more steaks in the freezer in the city. I’ll cook one on Fri 20 and on Mon 30. I’m running out of dinner on the first weekend of January. Ask Robert to go to the Organic Shop and get me some by then. We won’t be able to visit our regular farmer until Jan 10.
Alternatives for steak are chicken soup from the organic shop, fish from the fish stand, liver wurst, eggs. The butcher in the city (might he have organ meats? They won’t be organic…)
We’ll be needing organic eggs somewhere in the next few weeks, I’ve only got about 36 at the moment (2 for breakfast and some for the cookie dough)
Do we have enough spices, coconut oil, pickles, liverwurst, chocolate, cream and butter? (?, nah, no, no, yes, no and yes)
Bring with me from the cabin to the city:
there’s still the issue of the laundry…
Today, Monday the 16th, I had an awful day. I feel very weird. Utterly miserable, in my body and in my head. My chemistry is totally messed up. It could be from the four cookies I ate yesterday. Which drives home the point for the coming weeks:
don’t cheat, don’t eat bad things.
pic by Michal Zacharzewski
BAD THING TODAY:
As today was miserable I had to cancel the wool spinning group tomorrow. I’m sad about that. It’s been almost half a year now since I last saw them. Every month I have hopes and this month I was going to go for sure. I’m nearby, I have a car. But alas.
It was also suggested to me that I better postphone the appointment I have in Amsterdam on Thursday.
I’m not ready to that. Although I do recognize the sound sensibility of canceling. It would bring rest. It would mean I get to decorate the tree. Get to prepare for cookies.
But canceling feels, at the moment, as some sort of surrender to the illness. And I’m utterly fed up with it and not prepared to surrender. I’m very angry at being ill at the moment and it’s the reason I’m so attacking this illness from all different angles for the last couple of weeks. It also keeps me very wired and this is counterproductive, I’m well aware. But for now I have no zen. I’ll sleep on it and then I’ll reschedule it to the New Year because I’m such a good girl grrrr
pic by Iris Scherer
GOOD THING TODAY:
A good thing for today was that I followed up on my good intentions and lay down this morning, one hour after breakfast. Properly down too, all horizontal, tucked in with woolen blankets and the cat. I had remembered to take the bare minimum of supplements including a digestive aid. My belly rewarded me with rumbles and I felt proud and grateful.
So that’s how far I’ve come. A schedule for when I’m not doing anything. I haven’t figured out yet how to juggle the things on the schedule and the things on my calendar.
For one thing: resting after eating will be skipped. This probably means I shouldn’t eat for nutrients on those occasions but for energy. Lightly digestable foods.
I’m glad with the schedule. I think it’s good that I identified a few slots of time where I can just walk around the house and pick up on things that need to be done. Hopefully one of them will be laundry because I’m running a bit low on things to wear.
also by pic by Iris Scherer
pills to rectify my Zinc deficiency are releasing Copper into my bloodstream. This is poiseneous and my body reacts to that. I’ve had a couple of bad nights and now i’m back at 30% functionality.
I’ve managed to cook foods, vacuum the living room and do one laundry. I had to cancel all apointments this week including a test drive for a small car for me to combat the isolation I live in in this cabin. I’ve not been able to take a shower for quite some days now. And it is 4 AM at night and again I am awake, burning the cortisol I need to awake in the mroning.
It is a logical reaction to the Zinc. A healthy one too, as Copper excess is not good. So are “they” saying.
I’ll continue to take Zinc but at a much lower dosage.
For now I have to consent to this set back. I’ve had a big cry over it.
Brainfog is here again too, I’m carrying around my books but have not opened them.
Two, no three good things:
1. I’ve found two sites whit forums where people have the same reactions. Curezone.com and risingphoenix or phoenixrising. There has been new information since I last searched for fellow ill people and I am happy to see there are now people listing the same weird symtpoms as I have and interesting discussion about them. One about why showering can be debilitating (low functioning thyroid can’t cope with change of heat) and a few other people who have my sleep pattern (awake with cortisol peak after 5 hours of sleep)
2. I have ordered a genome typing kit. Knowing about some genes might tell me about some enzyme pathways that are not fuctioning properly. I already found zomeone who’s done this and has earily similar symptoms and a falthy gene code to account for it. Look for Gestalt’s info at risingpheonix. It is a COMM (cont?) sequence. In a couple of weeks time I can use my nightly energy peak for some enzyme puzzle research.
3. Having to cancel appointments released me of the need to take a shower for social benefits,..
(There was another third reason but I forgot it)
Ps. O yes this was it: I did some gardeing. Plans are still on their way. I have not lost the battle against ground elder in one particular spot of geranium this year.
MarvelLogic 