Living the plan.

I think I’ve got all my ducks in a row now.
pic by vanora

I’ve got a pretty good theory about why I fell ill and what I can do to get well. I’ve devised a plan that will get me there, in about 5 years I estimate. (better hurry slow)

Now all I have to do is live it.

Which is pretty hard to do. I’m more of an event kind of person than a structural one. I’m the one you get for thinking up a businessplan and dressing the store. Actually manning the store and enjoying the day to day runnings is not my strong suit.

This morning I learned about Angel Adoree. A remarkable woman who secured investments from The Dragons Den for her Vintage Pastries Experiences.
She’s also loved by Dick Strawbridge, another entrepeneur who gets me all excited.

Both are enthousiastic people, daring to show who they are and making a living out of their passions. And they enjoy a quirky appearance, which always gets my appreciation.

At the end of the sequence that shows how Angela pitched the Dragons and viewing her website and activities, I was crying.

Of course I’m a bit unhappy that they live the life I so long for. Doing fun things, building new businesses, doing eco-engineering, hosting vintage tea parties. But crying??
It’s these damn hormones and this sensitive brain chemistry.

I know.
My body is detoxing every day now, with the Folinic Acid and the B12. Heavy metals are floating all about. With my brain chemistry make up (MAO A mutation etc.) and my Progesteron defficiency I respond to the slightest imbalance.
I cry. I feel deplorable. I don’t want to live.

Which is why I am doing this slow, this healing plan.
Which is a drag because I’m impatient by nature and loose interest once I understand a thing. It’s new things to learn and puzzles to solve that keep me enthousiastic.

But here I find myself, dripping tears and heaving with misery. Grinded to a halt and no power left to move.
Best thing to do when feeling like this is ignore it, to make sure Progesterone and Valerian are on board, get the bile is flowing (take HCL or vinegar) and help the body move these toxins into the bile and out of the body.
That means: move. Get outside. Take that walk. Or take a shower.

Which is what I did. I went outside and did my walk.

I want to state publicly and clearly that going outside and taking that small walk in that state of mind is a mighty great accomplishment.
I deserve an award.

As a matter of fact, here it is:
which I totally ripped from this site and am too tired to figure out who made it and should be credited.
I’m awesome with flaws, like that.
But Chuck, Honey Badger and I don’t care, not today.

now swim, you bastards. Swim every day for five years and watch me win this fight in slow motion.
pic by katelyn thomas

PS stopping the N-A-C worked. I’m back to sleeping. I try and time the detoxing for daylight hours
Am slightly worried about too low cysteine levels. However, am banking on slow processes and full spectrum amino-acids (also known as runny egg yolks) giving the body plenty room for handling things.


Mercury on the brain

Didn’t sleep well for two nights, was weirdly alert and confused at the same time during the day. Tried to think what could cause this.

One thing I’d changed was I started taking N-A-C (N-Acetyl-Cysteine)
It’s good for the liver as it provides Cysteine that it uses to make Glutathione.
Only thing is: it moves mercury out of the liver and other tissues, into the brain. People with sensitive brain chemistry like me might experience effects from that. My N-A-C was a fairly big dose: 600 mcg. Half of it would be better.
for now: stop taking N-A-C

Also: I cut my hair. Meant to use the thinning out scissors. Grabbed regular scissors instead.
I’m wearing a hat for now. And cropping pictures strategically.

little break

I’m taking a break from blogging. My shoulder hurts, ever since that try out lesson of Power Yoga.
I’m easing up on the fine repetitive movements i.e. typing on computers and knitting. See you in a week.

Sleep: progesterone pill works

Here are my sleeping hours of the previous month:
slaapuren jan 2014

Quite a lot of nights I slept through! (compared to my usual sleeping pattern)
In yellow when I took a progesterone pill to bridge the gap from nonREMsleep to REMsleep. I upped the dose as my period drew closer. This did not always work.

And here it’s sorted without taking into account the time the clocks said I went to sleep. Each purple block is 15 minutes of sleep:
slaapuren gecorrigeerd
compared to my record of the previous month, without prog pills:

In yellow is when I took a 100mg Progesterone pill. This is Utrogestan, the bio-identical hormone.

On some nights I didn’t sleep through. There were some causes: I did an earthing experiment around 17th of December. This messed me up, had my brain overexcited for three days afterwards.
The Atlas Profilax treatment may have had something to do with the nightmare I had.
The massage might have released all kinds of toxins.
On Jan 8/9 I took a lot of folinic acid (leucovorin) which releases too much excitement on my brain, I feel. I also forgot to take Valerian.
Then, as my period drew neared even two pills did not have the desired effect.
On Jan 21st I laid awake all night with terrible pains, from the baby carrots I had eaten the day before.

So it is important for me that my intestines are comfortable (foodwise + HCL help); that I take my Valerian each evening; that there are no sounds waking me up (especially deep rumbling sounds) and that I take a progesterone pill right before going to sleep.

Running Scared

I’ve got two kinds of scared going on at the moment.

One is a result of the gruesome murder mysteries I watched on my first night of a fortnight alone in the cabin in the dark, dark woods. Not so smart.

Two is having some success at treating my disease but not finding many people who recover from it permanently. As in… there may be a hand full of them out there. World wide.
Most people who make a good recovery only find themselves crumbling to pieces a couple of years later.

I am really, really scared.

pic by Ron Jeffreys

It’s the first night I’ll be sleeping alone again. I’ve been spending the last couple of weeks together with my husband, with me being in the city and all. There’s a good comfort in sleeping in a room with someone else. At least there’s one other pair of ears to hear trouble coming.

But I needed some time alone. To recuperate from the city impulses. To experience silence. To be alone with my thoughts. And to please the cat who loves to be here, in the cabin, and is pretty bored in the city.

So here I am. Two weeks in the cabin. Shifting from city-glamour-fairy to nature-knitting-gnome.
I was a bit bored on the first night, having to lay on the couch, so I watched some British murder mysteries. That’s allright.
Then something out on the porch went “boonk.” And the cat woke up from her slumber, looking worried. When she does that, that really freaks my out.

pic by Angel Norris

I had to relearn all the things I learned the first time I started spending time alone in the cabin here. That I am like a bird, hidden away in it’s nest. That I am invisible to most of “the people out there”. That I have a leftover habit from childhood of not having a basic sense of safety. That statistics are on my side: as I have seldom experienced a night with a burglar or fire in my life, chances are that this night will be a repeat of all those tranquil nights. Put your fate in probabilities, darling!
Put in your earplugs, make like a woolen blanket burrito and go to sleep.


This is the real thing. This doesn’t go away with a solid bit of reasoning.
I’m scared because the things I do seem to be helping.

pic by Andrea Kratzenberg

The egg yokes and chicken soup I eat nourish me. The Zinc level I restored over the Summer works so well, I now crave Zinc every day. The Atlas Profilax, I now crave a walk every day. The laying down I do, my small intestine is so grateful. The HCL I take, my bile is working. The Progesterone I take, I am more at ease. The Progesterone pill I take at night, I am sleeping through the night. The diet I have, I have more energy and less moodswings. The mB12 and Folinic Acid, I’m working towards daily equilibria. The pacing I do, it gives me more good days and rekindling of some of my basic interests. The stress(y people) avoidance, works like a charm.

I’ve more or less created all the conditions for healing. There’s not much else I can do, it is now up to my body and time to get better.

That’s one scary thing right there: I’ve tapped into all the resources available. Conditions for healing are now pretty much optimal. Meaning: there’s nothing else I can do, I have no options left. This is the one basket, these are all the eggs.

Let’s hope this hand basket is not going anywhere bad…
pic by Slawek Ujma

Of course I’m hopeful that I am on the right track here. That I will continue to get better.
I even started dreaming of healing fully. Of growing old healthily.

But when I search for people recovering from ME/CFS I find but a few of them.

A lot of people make recovery. Some quite remarkably! They find a magical thing that works for them and they recover and start living life and raising puppies and running marathons.
But then they deteriorate again. Over time they grow worse than they were before.

There are not enough people permanently healed from ME/CFS out there! There should be more!

There’s a myth on the ME-boards. The myth of the invisible recovered people. We don’t see them because, when they recover, they leave the boards and start living again. They are enjoying their health. They have no time to return to the boards and tell us what worked for them. The myth is that people dó recover. But we never hear from them again. With good reason.

The recovered people who do return and tell their story are often met with skepticism and loud demands for solid medical proof. Or they are told to come back in five years because only then can one really claim to be recovered.
Or there’s just plain denial that they were ever properly ill to begin with. There’s a real ME-mafia out there that wants to be taken seriously by doctors and therefor shuns all associations with Adrenal Fatigue or CFS. They are quick to deny someone the diagnosis of ME.

But even if they don’t return to the boards to tell their story, recovered people must be somewhere. And they must be reminiscent and voicing that somewhere online. I want to find recovered people!
Because I have not yet. And that scares me shitless. Because all the recovering I do can be just that: a prelude to a disheartening relapse in my future. And if there’s one thing I never want to go through again, it is the first phase of this disease. When all systems fail, your personality is wiped out and you are withering away.
Especially now that I am all tapped out on resources. This is all I’ve got.

I’m scared.

pic by Maciej Perek

Art: I saw The Mediterranean by Pierre Bonnard.

Yesterday I spend hours in Amsterdam. I walked the city, enjoying its history and current atmospheres. Capitals are such a delight, especially when you walk slightly off the beaten tourist track. See where the real people live.

I visited museum l’Hermitage, which is a Dutch dependance of l’Hermitage in Saint Petersburg in Russia. Thanks to the historical appreciation our two countries share, starting when Peter the Great came to Holland and admired our skill in building sea vessels.

It showed some works by Gaugain, Bonnard and Denis that usually are in Russia, in the magnificient Winter Palace.
I came for Bonnard.

Mediterranean by Bonnard

They showed Mediterrenean View. A tryptich commissioned by the wealthy Russian collector Ivan Morozov who fell for these painters when they were alive and painting. He commissioned Denis to illuminate his grand ball room. It was reconstructed in Amsterdam and I see why it was the talk of the town, back in the day.

Bonnards work is also large. Three canvasses about 2 m wide and 4 m high each. They were hung with two mock collumns in front, to mimic how it would have looked in the russian house.

I spend all in all an hour and a half in front of the painting. Thinking new things, seeing new things all the time. Colours, shapes, combinations, claire-obscure.
It was a lovely time.

My artist’ blood started flowing again.

PS there are some quirky things in this painting!

  • What’s the bright red and blue shed doing in the far right? Bonnard is all about pastels, why feel the need to insert these bright blobs?
  • Who in their right mind puts warm egg yolk yellow in the green lushes of a tree? Bonnard, that’s who. In the top of the middle panel.
  • The right panel has clear dark and light shapes playing against each other. The left panel does not however. Does that make this painting lob sided? If not, why not?
  • some parts have gotten no paint at all, the bare beige canvas is just showing. What guts to send it to a collector and declare it finished!
  • On the left, that’s his wife. Playing with a cat. Guts! And a cat nut. You’d be surprised how much paintings of Bonnard have a cat in them.

Monday: beating the blues

I’m wearing my new dress:
Judging by the amount of posts last week we can safely assume the chatter in my head has died down. And it has. I spend most days at the cabin, resting, knitting, taking little walks outside.

The wired chatter must have been a residue from things I ate in the city, sugary things. They’ve now left the system. I’ve had a week of taking a 100 mg progesteron pill at night and sleep has been good – by my standards.
Now the menstrual cycle is kicking in, throwing off all buttons and dials so last night I slept poorly.

I had a weird thing happen on Thursday and Friday: camomille tea made me sad. I was truly sad, living in this small world of ours. Walking around the little meadow near the cabin I saw how this country is all neat and tidy. No room for messy nature where animals can flourish.
We add more houses and cars every day. It is really getting crowded here. Animals are loosing their habitats, we are loosing the animals.

Historic landscapes are cleaned up, shoveled over, optimized, modernized.
I no longer find the landscapes I know from old paintings: horizons, wide rivers, cows with horns. I no longer find the landscapes I knew from 30 years ago.

painting by Willem Maris, around 1900

This is normal progress of time. People live their lives, they do their things, they alter their environment. All together we alter our country, our continents, our earth. There’s no use whining about it. This is how human life lives.

Sometime a small thing can make a huge difference in this flow and unexpected gems come up. Like how people find each other on the internet. We could whine all day about www pornography and violent movies on the net and how people are no longer connected to their irl community or their own feelings, how they hide anonymously and troll the net and how progress is nothing but misery.
But unexpectedly there’s an online knitting community that sparks goodness: gives people new connections, new friendships, in real life. Or the joy people get from looking at online cat pictures. That’s really one of the weirdest things, how big that one got.

Surely there are things like that to be found when walking about in my crowded country. But I couldn’t see them. Because my serotonine was low. Because of camomille tea.
It was camomille-valerian-lavender tea. To calm down the chatter. The Sympathetic Nervous System. Which it did. An odd experience. And 100% reproducable.
pic by cozgrl05
I quit the tea. The next day -and after that- I enjoyed my walks. Serotonine levels are up again. I’m a happy junkie.

Now it’s Monday morning. I’m back in the city. I’m having a bit of a hard time as the week before my period has begun. My mood is in mineur. I need lots of progesteron and lithium. My belly hurts. I also got a gift from a friend: a book about Norwegian cabins. The pain of missing that country hit me big, again. It hurts. I cry.

I’m also annoyed because there are about 14 things I really want to do today but I’m only good for 2. And those should be the sensible things (make soup, have a walk) and not the fun things (read an artbook, try out the new pencils)
I had a crappy night. My shoulder hurts for days now, I can’t lift things, can’t use the halters I bought.

So here’s me on Monday morning: I have put on my princess dress. It makes me feel a bit better.

Never mind the legwarmers, it’s about the dress and the layers. They’re mostly handknits. These months I love to dress in Winter Queen colours: blues, silver, mint, aqua, greens.

Underneath, in my spirit, I am a small strong bird. A Kingfisher. A Kolibri. A Starling. A small bird with determination and streaks of sparkling blues.
pic by Bruce Brouwer
pic by hislightrq

What I eat: 1400-2200 Kcal; 154 gr fat; 47 gr protein; 30 gr khd

For fun I listed this morning what I eat on normal days. This is my typical intake, I don’t vary much.

for breakfast: two egg yokes warmed a teaspoon of coconut fat, with pepper.

for snack/brunch/lunch/snack: a total of 175 ml of whipped cream and 40 grams of Lindt 85% dark chocolate. This can be plain or made into ganache. I eat portions through the day but the main part at lunch.

before/after dinner: two or three slices of liverwurst with 6 to 8 small pickles.

dinner: a piece of organic meat with a slice of full fat butter.

during the day: 2 l of herbal tea and/or water, each cup with added salt.

supplements, mainly minerals.

I plan to make a spread sheet with the portions and their nutritional values but for now I can tell you the total I eat on a day comes to:
1400 Kcal (at least. Probably closer to 1800)
154 grams of fat (at least. probably more. I love cream.)
47 grams of protein
30 grams of carbohydrates

this is a fat based, lightly ketogenic diet. I get my energy from the fats. My blood sugar and insulin levels are picture perfect.
My cholesterol is slightly elevated but as the good cholesterol is also high, the ratio is perfect.

I eat small portions, avoiding insulin triggers and preserving digestive energy. I chose high quality, rich tasting foods. This is all very tasty!

I aid my digestion with stomach acidifiers. 45 minutes after breakfast I go lie down and wait for my small intestines to process the food. This aids me much in terms of uptake of nutrition and preserving of overall energy.

On this intake I can do a normal day, including an activity such as a walk through the park or a shower. If I do more, say spend an afternoon in the city, then I eat more. Usually a piece of fish or shrimps with creme fraiche. Or more chocolate or sweeter chocolate or a chicken leg. Also more butter or coconut fat.

I think this way of eating is close to what Kwasniewski promotes in the Homo Optimum Diet.
I don’t know, I should check. I did start out on his diet but over time I’ve just gravitated towards these foods and am doing well on it for a few years now.
I’m never hungry. I don’t fret over portions or ratios. This is just what I eat.

Sometimes I crave things. Liver. Offal. Gelatine. Vanilla. I try to find it (offal is hard to find).
Other times I crave things I’ve recently eaten: chips, liquorice, cheap chocolate. These are different kind of cravings, these are addictions. I narrowed it down to a reaction to vegetable oils, sugar and artificial taste enhancers.
They are not necessarily bad (vegetable oils are pleasant) but I eat with care.

I think I miscalculated the cream. I thought I’d eat 100ml a day, I now think it’s closer to 250 ml. No way I’d survive on 1400 Kcal!
really, I’m taking in between 1800 and 2200. Because I’m in slightly ketogenic modus my body expells any energy it doesn’t need. It does this via ketones in urine and breath.
If you eat 1400 Kcal you are mismanaging your body. It could go in “survivor-mode”.

Sleep: slept through! Theory to the test.

Last night I took a Progesterone pill and I slept through the night on an unusual day of my cycle (day 13). I woke up refreshed and extremely happy. This supports the theory I’ve cobbled together in the last few days.

The happiness came from high serotonin and noradrenaline, I felt. And of having a good night sleep and perhaps having found another sensible theory!

On a side note:
I have noticed I’m quite excited the last few days.The amount of blog posts is indicative. This is “excited brain” on display. Not a good thing per sé.
And I feel a little sheepish that you all can see it.

I think it comes from the mB12 and Folinic Acid supplementation causing all kinds of waste to come free (akin to Copper Dumps) and raising noradrenaline. (the last week I’ve laid awake for 3 hours or more instead of the usual 1,5-2 hours). Aided by the Atlas Profilax treatment that activates overall my Sympathetic Nervous System is having a good time at the moment.
Luckily I succeed at shutting it up twice a day, when I take my horizontal rests.

The only other thing I know to do is be physically active during the day (I háve to walk outside every day since the AtlasPROfilax) and lessen the mB12 and Folinic Acid. Take a small break from Methylation.

So I’m going to the motions and I know it. I hope to calm down to my regular self in the future.

The post under this paragraph I wrote this morning for a Spanish guy on the forums that shares the same sleeping pattern as me. (should that be “as I”?)
It’s full of white space because brain fogged people need their words in small doses.

I’ve got a theory for my sleeping 5 hours and then lying wide awake for 2, being very alert. It fits all the symptoms and medical data I have.

after 5 hours I get excess noradrenaline on the brain. This prevents GABA rising and REMsleep commencing and makes one very alert.

Oral supplementing of the neurotransmitter Progesterone makes me sleep for 7 or 8 hours straight. Maybe because one of its metabolites, Allopregnanolone, dampens neurons firing and promotes GABA. It is as potent as benzo’s and sleepingpills, which is what most people use for this kind of insomnia.

Progesterone is NOT a female sex hormone.

In the brain a small amount of noradrenaline is needed after the 4,5 hours of nonREMsleep to stop the REM-off neurons from firing and let REM-on neurons start. When REM-on neurons get active GABA will rise and REMsleep will start.

REM sleep depends on high GABA.

Too much noradrenaline makes this impossible. GABA will not rise and insomnia will cause more noradrenaline. Noradrenaline is the neurotransmitter that makes you very very alert.

Reason might be MAO A not breaking down noradrenaline sufficiently due to a mutation.

Another reason might be too low Progesterone (I have this, tested and proven). Progesterone is not a female sex hormone, it is a human hormone. Testosterone is made from it. Cortisol is made from it. And it is a neurotransmitter in the brain.

In the brain Progesterone increases MAO’s activity slightly.

Progesterone’s most profound neuronal effect, however, results from its direct effect on the neuronal membrane. Progesterone has an inhibitory effect on neuronal excitation, depressing neuronal firing.

One of its metabolites in the brain is Allopregnanolone. This is a neuroactive steroid that does something with GABA. It has a potency similar to that of the most potent benzodiazepines (Valium etc) and approximately a thousand times higher than pentobarbitals (sleeping pills).

(I still need to check my sources but this one put me onto Allopregnanolone and this one researches REMsleep)

Noradrenaline is noradrenergic, meaning to do with the Sympathetic Nervous System.
Onset of REMsleep and GABA is from cholinergic brain input, it is about the Parasympathetic Nervous System. (source here)
The nervous system is not limited to the brain, of course.

– stop noradrenaline from rising (how? how? How do I get the Sympathetic Nervous System to shut up?)
– stop REM-off neurons from continious firing (how? by taking benzo’s? by taking Allopregnanolone?)
– raise GABA (how? taking precursors?)

Taking GABA is useless, it cannot go through the blood brain barrier (BBB) because it is too big a molecule, say people on the forums here. If a GABA supplement does have a soothing effect it means your BBB is leaky (search forums on this, Hip and Gestalt say smart things about this)

Progesterone: only take progesterone, no progestins. Be vigilant about this. Read the label.

Take the oral pill, not the cream, someone one the forums here said the pill form is the only form that yields Allopregnonalone. As is my own experience too.

In Europe the (only) correct brand for Progesteron is Utrogestan. It is not over the counter. Your doctor will probably resist and needs to be educated. Both on Progesterone/Progestins and on males needing this basic hormone.

A 100 mg pill gets converted to 10mg active Progestrone (the liver filters out the rest, working hard). This 10mg is the dose a regular human body needs for a regular day, it’s a physiological doses. It is what a normal body produces on its own. Supplementing the full 10mg is too much for a man who -presumably- produces at least some of his own in his adrenals. Problem.

Females need more because they also use Progestrone to balance out Estrogens. Their physiological dose varies every day and can range from 10 to 60mg. (60mg on day 21 of cycle)

Larger Utrogestan pills (200/500mg) are for females in pregnancy. They may need much more than the daily 60mg to keep their baby on board which is where the hormone gets its name: PRO-GESTational-hoRmONE and our association with it being a female sex hormone.

There is no knowing in advance how your body choses to convert the Progesterone. It may raise your Testosterone, your Cortisol, your Aldosterone. Taking too much may numb the receptors or lower your own production.
HRT is risky business. Always start low and go slow.

10 mg Progesterone is excess of what a man needs, I feel. I’d want 20 or 50mg pills to start with but these are not produced. You could cut open a capsule and take only the white liquid, I guess. It looks like paint.

One thing about taking physiological doses is that your body is able to get rid of it within the day. You are not overdosing as is often the case with conventional HRT or other drugs.

ME/CFS people probably have decreased capacity for elimination so should even take less, of any drug or supplement. On a positive note: we notice effects sooner so small doses give us information fast.

On some nights I take 100mg Utrogestan pills for my menstrual cycle and then I sleep through the night every time, unless it’s the last week before my period. I was told sleepiness was a symptom of too high a dose. Now I am not so sure. It feels awful during the day and I avoid it. But at night I sleep well and wake up with new vigour. And now I found a plausible explanation for it.

As long as my liver can stand it and I wake up feeling refreshed I am now taking Progesterone at night. The correct thing to do is find out with how low a dose I sleep through. But because my need as a female differs each day and I have CFS I’m not up for cutting up pills and taking notes yet.

For you I have no quick solution, sorry. Only this theory that, to me, makes sense and fits both our symptoms.

I just learned the antibodies to GLUTEN also block conversion from glutamate into GABA.
Leaving ones brain with too much glutamate (*boing! boing!*) and not enough GABA (zzzzz…)

source =

Design: cats & dogs

I’m writing this post beforehand and I’m time-posting it. That way you can read this post at the same moment my friend Carla unwraps her birthday present and finds this:


A shawl pin in the shape of a dog, shitting sparklies!

It has a long pin at the back that you weave through the fabric.


I so much hope she likes it…. she is a dog person and has a sense of humour. But still…

I had the most fun designing these, as you know. Finishing them was quite a task…

The brown sparkly flowers can be turned around, then they are just plain silver. Carla likes silver. As do I.


I made two more:


These are the ones that started it all. They are proper dogs, no sparklies.

A year ago I promised to make these two friends shawlpins, it was a commission. But I couldn’t muster up the energy or inspiration to make them. Not even cats. For a whole year long! I felt guilty and inferior every month, but I just couldn’t face the wire and the hammer.

They both graciously understood and haven’t pushed me. For which I am SO GRATEFUL! That’s when people truly understand how life can be hard and that consentious people don’t need pressure.

And then that lovely time came when Pippi visited and I could finally put my appreciation into inspiration into wire-sensation.

The moment you read this, one of them is dropped off by the postman, the other one is dropped of by me. These are gifts, because I so much appreciate them them.

I hope they all like them!

In other news I also made some cats, with brush and ink. This is one of the five x-mas cards that háve to go out this season. I’ve painted five thus far, written and send off two.


I’m in no way content with these. The paper was way too smooth for the ink, it didn’t hold very well. Still it was lovely to do so I made them anyway. Then my husband said to use them because “as long as you can make out what it’s meant to be, you can get away with it”.

That’s one way of dashing past the inner critic.

Now I’ve got to dash. Birthday party to go to. In my own car. Wearing my festive dress. Bringing pins. And, on the way there, picking up a set of dumbell halters. I’m going to work on my back muscles.